You might think that in this day and age – it’s 2011 for heaven’s sake! – that God’s message regarding the end of the world would be Tweeted or Grouponed (End of the World – 100% off!) rather than lettered onto the back of a hulking Toyota Land Cruiser. In case you can’t read the fine print, it says, “HOLY GOD WILL BRING JUDGEMENT DAY ON MAY 21, 2011” along with “1-800-543-1495” just above the bumper. Jesus, don’t you know that SUVs are so out of style?
Besides, May 21, 2011 is not that far away – if you’ve been really bad, is there really enough time to undo all of those sinful deeds and gain entry into everlasting life? Some people I know would probably have to pull a month of do-nothing-but-good-deeds all nighters just to have a shot at salvation. Then again, are there enough old ladies to help cross the street at 3 in the morning? The only ladies I know on the street at 3am are the ones that got you into this mess in the first place.
I will say this – the use of all caps is entirely appropriate here. Anything less than announcing the end of the world should be normal case.